Sunday, 26 June 2016

it hurts how,
different people have different perspective and views,
towards love.

teach me how to love you,
teach me how can i love you,
teach me how should i love you.

what is love to you?

everyone loves differently.
how they express themselves,
& how they choose to love someone.

& that's what hurts the most.

i don't understand this at all.

why am i feeling hurt for no reason?


Saturday, 25 June 2016

all she wanted

all she wanted was to feel loved,
all she wanted was to spend time with you,
all she wanted was to love you.

but why did you choose to hurt her?

what had she done in order to deserve this?
is loving you something she shouldn't have done?

do you still remember back then?
when you made promises to her,
saying how will you love her no matter what,
& that you will never give up on her.

how does it feels without her in your life now?
are you happier now?


Saturday, 18 June 2016

you don't understand.

please don't claim that you understand me,
when you weren't there when
i broke down and cry to sleep
at 2am.

don't claim that you understand me,
when all you think of is,
'oh she's just faking her sadness by retweeting shits on twitter'

don't claim that you understand me,
when you don't even bother.

don't claim that you understand me,
because even if i have a chance to,
no matter how much I try to explain myself,
telling you how i felt,
you will not understand.

so please,
don't tell me that you understand how i felt,
when you clearly don't.

you are not me.
you can't read what's on my mind,
neither can you know how i felt.

you don't know anything,
and you will never understand.


Tuesday, 14 June 2016

i hope you remember me,

i hope you remember us.

those times that we spent together,
learning new alphabets together,
doing new handicraft together,
playing together,
& being able to hear you share about the previous day,

being able to be by your side,
to see you learn,
to see you being able to talk better,
to see you grow.

the thought of
being able to see your faces,
makes waking up at 6am,
having to squeeze with the crowd,
& to reach work at 8am
something that i look forward to.

two months seem to be such a long period of time,
but how i wish,
i could have more time,
to spend with you.

i never thought
saying goodbye will be this hard.

i hope you're doing fine.
i miss you.


dedicated to N2 Agility

Thursday, 9 June 2016


it scares me how terrifying some people are.

nice to you,
but secretly,
they wished that you are dead.

they wished that you are dead,
they wished that you fail in life,
they wished that you don't exist.

it's terrifying how people get close to you,
not because of who you are,
but because of what you have.

it's so terrifying how some people can love others,
not because they love them,
not because they want them,
but because they want to ruin them.

and now im here,
wishing that i don't know any of this,
wishing that i remained silent,
wishing that i've never known you.


I'm afraid tomorrow will never come,
for me or for you. 
I'm afraid to be first, to hurt you,
but I'm afraid to be last, to be left alone.
I'm afraid that tomorrow you will not look at me the same,
I'm afraid I will not look at you either.

It's not like we don't love each other,
it's just that we feel too much,
listen too often, and hurt day after day.
I want to feel your grasp at my shirt,
holding me close and eyes on me,
but if I can't feel that,
I'd rather be dead.